Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Day 15

I'm feeling horribly depressed today.  Like I want to come out of my skin depressed and anxious.  It's awful.  I think the biggest thing gnawing at me is the fact that I'm almost 38, single, and not a mom.  I only ever wanted to be a mom, which I'm sure I've mentioned before, and somehow all this time has just drifted by.  I've allowed my life to just float on past me for 38 years.  It doesn't help that I was feeling all unliked on Saturday because of my birthday party, nor does falling off the wagon the past few days...I could go on and continue to list my troubles.

Fortunately, I haven't eaten my depression.  I've done pretty well.  I should be getting up and moving and doing some kind of workout, but just haven't.  I haven't left the house since Saturday...I don't think I've even SHOWERED since Saturday.  I guess I'll move that up to the tip top of my "to do" list.

My weight was back down below Saturday's weight today, so that was a relief.  No idea what I'm having for dinner tonight.  We ended up ordering pizza last night and that was not good.  Better than the olden days, but still not what it should have been.

I'm still tracking and keeping up with my food tracker on Excel, I just haven't posted any of it yet.  I would like to see another pound gone this week.  A pound a week is really so, so simple!  If I can just keep this food demon I have hovering over me all the time at bay, then I will be able to stay in my points for the next four days and see another loss on Saturday!

So what do you do when you need a lift out of a funk that you're in?

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